I've had ideas ever since I started working full time. And every time I would let someone tell me it wouldn't work. Years later I would see that same idea blow up. I've always worked for someone else. Made them money, be loyal to them, and give 100% to them. Doing all that though as not gotten me anywhere in life. I've been fired for one reason or another and I've also been laid off due to the failings of that company. That's when I realized I had to do something.
Once I decided that I no longer wanted to work for somebody else I had to come up with something that would make me money and something that I would enjoy doing it. Once I decided what I wanted to do, I had to figure out how to make it happen. That not knowing, kind of, froze me a little bit. That moment of not moving forward jarred my thoughts. I said to myself, I can either not do anything at all or start doing something. That's when I started to formulate what my business would be about. I started researching and putting things together. Then, boom, the birth of my business.
Things haven't started out smooth and my business had to take a pause for about six months but I finally got back at again. This time it's a little further along then it was before. Slow progress. The business is a web based business so I will eventually have to advertise to bring in the traffic. Also the type of business has forced me to look for help. I decided to reach to 5 people that I trust. I received 4 yes and but it turns out that I may only have 2 partners. Even if I don't get the assistance I need I would be able to do it myself it will just be a little slower than I want it to be.
All in all I'm happy that I started this journey. It has given me focus and a joy that I don't think I would have ever experience working for someone else. The day my business turns into a profit versus a deficit will be a joyous and satisfying day.
I woke up today with an understanding of love. Love is a choice.
I think falling in love is what screws everyone up. The question, are you in love with, is a complicated question. I'm not quite sure what falling in love is. Let me correct that last statement. I'm not quite sure that being or falling in love is relevant to loving someone unconditionally.
I fell in love a million times over and never really realized it. I fell in love with the way she touched me. I fell in love with the way she writes. I fell in love with the way she speaks. I fell in love with the way she smells. I fell in love with the way she dresses. I fell in love with the way she walks. I fell in love with the way she treats me.
With this understanding I can see why people fall out of love. Maybe she doesn't dress the same, or smell the same, or do the same things she used to do. I fell in love a lot of times and I wonder if those things are the things that supposed to keep you attached to the individual while you choose to love that person. I guess I'm wondering if you don't choose to love that person then you are using that person for that feeling you get when you around that person and I guess that's why it's easy for someone to cheat.
If you choose to love someone then you will always respect them. That means you will never cheat, harm, or do things that will intentionally hurt her.
To end this, I just want to say, if you fall in love don't forget to choose to love them. Doing so will cause you to choose them first in any decision that you make.
There comes a time in your life when someone else’s writing takes you to a place you thought you would never venture. At the same time, it makes you realize just how judgmental you are and the people around you are. I am not God and I don’t know the motivations of men who writes such books. However, what I do know is the things that pertain to me. The struggles that I deal with. My passions, my sins, my wants and my needs are all my own. My relationship with God and what he speaks to me is the only thing I should listen too.
I don’t understand why we are so invested in each other lives. Why we are invested with what someone else is doing. I understand if it’s something that directly or indirectly affects you but if it doesn’t affect you why concern yourself with it? I guess in the same breath, why should I be worried about what someone else is concerned with? Who am I to tell someone in which to live their life?
I believe we are to busy trying to get someone to understand our cause, our beliefs, our facts, our lives, instead of stating why we believe what we believe, stating our cause, stating the facts, and explaining our lives. I believe once we state what we need to state, then we need to take action and leave alone the ones that drain our energy opposing our views. I believe that we would accomplish a lot more by doing this.
This is a rambling with no cohesive point but this is my writing and I really started writing this because of the feeling I got by watching Sense 8. So much was in this show but the main thing I took out of it was, we live our lives in fear or negligence of other’s judgment.
Writing is a gift, also I think it's something that can be learned. I'm not sure when, or how I found myself stuck. Unable to string sentences together. Unable to find things to write about. I'm sure it's fear, but I'm not sure what I'm scared of. If writing is my gift, and I write for myself, then why do I struggle to do the one thing that I love to do?
I search for my old writings. I search for anything that would give me some type of inspiration to display all the things my mind has to offer. Of course I seem to come up empty and resort to using my old writings to display my current situation. No growth, no value, just words that I chose at that time to display in this time.
I wanted to write and not follow the rules that everyone say that I should follow. I wanted to do my own thing. So I need to stop this worrisome shit and do what I love to do. Even if I decide not to use what I create. That's better than using a younger version of myself to do what I now seem like I cannot do. From this post on I shall I not follow the rules and do what I want to do. Share what I want to share and run this site like I want to run this site.
I'm not sure where I will end up, but I'm finally following my dream. So I wouldn't be me if I didn't say that you are able to do the same thing.
I knew I was different towards the end of my teenage years. I had come to embrace it, I had come to capitalize on it, I had realize that it was more beneficial to be me more than being what I felt like society wanted me to be. The only problem at that time though, was that I didn't have any focus. I continued to let people in my life, without fully understanding what relationships were all about and the difficulty in maintaining those relationships. So in a way the book I wrote, the book that was published, in some ways is a story of my life.
The character in my book set out to accomplish something, but things and people always seem to derail him from his mission. As for me, I never knew what I wanted to do but you can say my mission was to find myself and prosper in life. And just like in the book, I never seem to get there because I allowed people in my life to derail me from my goals. I always find myself starting over a lot. So in a way I can relate to the character in my book.
Another thing my character in the book struggled with, is knowing what girl to love. He had many options and they each offered different things. However, he found himself finding it hard to trust, or just found something in their character that they didn't like. For me, it's similar in the fact that I don't know who I'm supposed to love or be with. The difference is, I believe I'm supposed to be alone but it seems that I can't stop myself from talking to women. It's like some innate thing that I have to do.
The thing that I most associate myself with the character in the book is his mind. My mind have a million times a million times infinity things going on in there. I often see visions along with things that I'm not sure is even in this world. I don't know what to believe or to trust because I know my mind is very imaginative and whatever I think or see comes alive. I can house a million different type of personalities in my brain and they are all from people that I observed from since my earliest memories.
So in conclusion the book I wrote has some truth to it. I know from when I first wrote this book and told people about it I tried to make sure people know this was purely fictional, and though this book is fictional, it has some truth to it.
It's crazy how religion really shaped my life. The first I do have to say is, I do believe in God. God and Religion is the sort of lock that has placed me on a path of truly not understanding who I am. The people in my life, mainly my parents and siblings, is the other major piece I do believe contributed to the person I am today. I sometimes wonder who is really inside of me because of how Christians and other religious people speak. Not only how they speak but how people view me and the perception people have. The fact is Religion truly screwed me. I guess the good news is that, without that part being in my life I would not have the restrictions I set on myself today and because of this I have been able to live a rather adventurous life.
The number one thing that I'm most confused by, or was confused by, because I am no longer confused by it but I have to mention it because it has shaped how I treat women and how I do not let the emotions of sex or the lust of sex move me. For the longest time I thought sex was bad, I thought because I wanted it would be the thing that would keep me from Heaven. My lustful nature would be met with disapproval from our Lord our God. I no longer believe this is true.
The number two thing that I was confused by, was the killing of humans. Once I was "saved" I struggled with my lust to see the life drain out of people. I struggled with my fantasies of killing people believing this too would keep from the good grace of God. I thought that if I went through with this that it would go away. I even did the whole feeding my soul with the word and tried to stay in prayer. However things would always come up that would bring me back to those fantasies. I started to believe that I wasn't meant to be in Heaven. The funny thing about our brains or whatever causes us to keep trying to be so called "good" is that when ever there was quiet in my life I searched for him. I always found myself repenting and trying to get rid of who I was. I tried shedding this flesh in countless ways to only find myself unsuccessful.
The number three thing that I was confused by was the way religious people acted. For all the things that I beat myself up for and tried so hard to not associate myself with, I see these same religious people murdering, raping, free sexual activities, judging and Lord knows what else. I believe this of all things confused me the most. Is religion the use of those people to control people and to get the things that the want?
So growing up Religion confused the hell out of me and it still does but I know one thing. I'm no longer religious. I still believe in God and believe he allowed things into my life to have a more of an understanding of what he's all about it. Religion planted a seed in my which I will never ever to be able to free myself from with out going on some sort of sabbatical. Even then I'm not sure if I would ever be free from it. This, though, is probably a good thing. One of the many things God has allowed to be a fixture on my troublesome brain.
I love, love. I wonder if I love it because of the feeling I get when I listen to love music. Or maybe I love it because I'm incapable of having that type of love. Either case, I know I love the idea of love. It's just something about giving your whole life to that one lifetime partner. It just something about having that look from your child's eyes that cannot be explained. That proud moment your parent has when they look at you. That family that I only dream of or read about it from someone else writings.
I know I will never really experience the fantasy I have about love, but when I sit and listen to Luther sing about it love, just takes me to a whole 'nother place. Like, why am I the way I am. Why can't I really experience this. In a way though, I am experiencing it through music and small notes I read from various women and finding cards my daughter created for me when she was little.
The funny thing is, I never really knew this was something that I was so infatuated with. I do know that I was not capable of creating works that displayed the love that I hear in music or read in books. The things that I create are more dark. The struggles one mind has with his own beliefs. But creation of love between two or more people seem to escape my world because of my own in-capabilities.
I'm completely fine though living this life I have been blessed with. I find the ability to watch people and affect lives is gratifying in itself. I also find dreaming about it seems more likely satisfying than trying to find that same love from someone who has agendas of their own or their own versions of what love is.
There are many things that I want to do with this life before my life is completely over. Things I want to leave behind for my daughter and the people I will leave behind on this earth. So for me, I love, love. But I really love the idea of love.
I decided to join Madden Franchise Leagues for m19 (Madden 19). I had retired at the end of the m18 season. What brought me out of retirement was that my laptop broke and my homies kept trying to pull me in. I decided to get it while I save up the money to buy me a new laptop.
What I want to do is post things and write things on this website. It gives me additional things to write about and I love playing Madden and writing. So far I'm only playing in one league. That's the league that one of my homies started. It's called All Hail Football. So far we are only in the first season, about 11 or 12 games into the season.
I want to join the leagues because of this Madden. I think this Madden is the best madden created. I love how the defense plays in this Madden. I also love the way the players progress. This madden really makes the veterans more valuable than in Madden's past.
I've pretty much been an ultimate failure in sim leagues, in the fact that I haven't been in the championship game. I believe that, I'm a pretty good player but in this Madden I believe I'm a great player. I love the fact that it's harder to cheese in this Madden.
Finally, I'm really joining the leagues for inspiration and content. Plus, I love playing the game.
I wrote a piece a while back that I admired. I just want to share with you all. I'm not sure why I like it so much but it is one of the writings I'm more proud of. It's a short piece. It's called "Just Knowing You".
Just Knowing You
As much as the earth is round, the waters are blue, and the night sky is black. I listen to every tear, every whisper, and every single heartbeat. Your dreams are the things I draw, your wishes are the things I search, and your desires are things I yearn to build. Your presence is my constant love, your voice is the perfect taste, and your mind is all that I desire. Your very being is the thing that constantly drives me to see all the things that I wish to see. Ever since that moment, Ever since that moment, Ever since that moment, ever since you came to existence I have searched for the many ways to obtain you. To surround my self with your essence. I'm captured by your beauty, captivated by your thoughts, and seduced by just knowing you exist. The music plays with every step, every breath, every thought that emanates from your body. I cannot control my humanly nature and I wish not to do so. Cause doing so would erase the feeling I feel just knowing you.
Damn I just want people to feel me like they felt Temptations, Five Heartbeats, Tupac, Al Green, Edgar Allen Poe, Zane, Musaffa, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., Paul, that song "I deserve" by Tank, the song "End of the Road" by Boys II Men, Eddie Murphy in Boomerrang, Whitney Houston, Puffy when him and J-Lo broke up, Christmas morning when you see snow on the ground, that ass whooping your grandma gave you, the night you lost your virginity, Bump N Grind and twelve play, that song "Sweet Lady" and the "Signs of Love Making" by Tyrese, your first love, the last day of school, first day of spring after a long winter, and that bottle of water when you been playing all day in the sun. I really do. I really want people to feel me till the end of time.
The title should say it all but because I'm writing it, it really doesn't. I'm forty-one years old. I feel old yet I feel young. How is that possible. As much as I don't care how things look, I do care about the perception I exhibit. So I act accordingly to things I don't care about and do. And as you may or may not know but Tupac was a role model for me growing up and a lot of things he said stuck with me. Real niggaz do what they want to do and bitch niggaz do what they can do. So I completely live by this. It has served me well. Now I'm faced with a new chapter in my life, with my daughter getting ready to graduate this year (2019). I have a sense of being free. A chance to start over and take chances that I could never take before. The best part is, I don't have to listen to anybody. I don't have to take care of anybody. I can do whatever I want to do without fear of damaging anybody. I want to be a kid all over again, but of course that will look weird so I have to come up with something to be other than that old boring cliche that I see some old people fall into.
The thing is, I'm not sure what it is that I want to do. I know I have to be careful. Making a kid can change this whole freedom thing. Don't want to do that. So my mission is to be mindful but yet free. Be fearless but fear the things that can change my new found gift. Entertain and be entertained, press boundaries, work for myself and be successful by having fun. I know it can be done. I done seen it. I'm ready to let loose my mind, detangle that shit and exercise my intelligence.
Sense humor when you don't have none in your younger years you better have 'em in your older years. Some may never need it but if you were built like me, had it like me, you best have developed a sense of humor. Probably wondering why this is called "Old Man Love", well you are about to find out. Life is interesting, I some how still am able to do things that I probably shouldn't be doing. Not that I'm doing what I was doing when I was younger but nevertheless are still doing the same things. The players are still the same, nothing changes. Not sure if I ever thought about this but it's here and I probably would have thought it would be different. Not to get anything misinterpreted but things are the same yet things are different. And I'm not quite sure which is better cause the feelings are still the same.
Before I get deep into this paragraph I do want to mention about the thing I miss most. That's the innocence that we displayed whether it was on purpose or intentional. I miss those moments. Now, man oh man, how things can go. Your manhood is connected to your manhood. My passion was once the strongest of all the land. Now he only comes out to play if I have to prove something or is caught up in the most passionate moments ever. I only can have this 3 to maybe 4 times a week. The sweet spot those is 2 times a week on random moments. I love this the best. Now that we got that out the way. Lets move on to me romancing a woman. Funniest shit ever. I feel like I'm always having an outer body experience. Oh but when them juices is flowing over your passionate areas, it's the best experience ever. I see how old man can keep making babies. I believe that's why you need to fuck women older than you. Get 'em in their sixties. No worries about babies.
I have a younger woman that I'm currently dealing with where the sex is so passionate I be ready get a ring and marry her. If I didn't have other issues this probably would have happened already. It's impossible to leave her alone. Even when I tell myself not to ever do it again here she come putting me in heaven. I'm up there talking to God like "she keep sending me up here. I'm not gonna stay long I'm about to dive back in screaming!" Oh, the passion that we have, definitely the best sex in my life.
I haven't had any major problems but I do notice that I get a lot more locking up on my joints and shit. Plus I put on some weight and I believe this contributes to me getting tired quicker and shit and finding myself pushing harder because it be feeling so damn good.
I guess it's a benefit to get you an old man. You get passion, humor, oldness, and someone who knows what the fuck they are doing. Nah, I'm joking. But they are benefits I just can't name them. As a matter of fact, or just a plan statement, I really don't know what the benefits are to old man love. I'm not even sure if this is something I should have even written about. The thought just hit me so I was like yea, let me show the humor side of being an old man who is trying to love on someone. It did not quite work out the way I had envisioned it. Partly, I'm not a comedian, and partly cause I'm a man and we are boastful creatures.
There are moments in my life that I'm glad that my grandmother introduced me to Religion. I'm glad that I learned about God and Jesus Christ. I'm glad because these moments that have me troubled or things aren't going my way I use God, whether that is right or wrong I don't know, but I use him because my mind or society or both would benefit greatly for this practice.
It's nothing like saying "fuck all of this! God you handle that shit." and whatever happens, happens. My only job is to prepare for how I will handle the situation. I plan out my reactions and the things that I will do. This is all planned.
So yes I'm grateful for my grandmother introducing me to God. I can let go with confidence that whatever happens I'm going to be straight. And I mean I going to be straight regardless of what happens.
I'm starting to think that I am broken. I was taking a shower and got to thinking about my life in whole. The unknown fears that I never really took notice. Really to busy conquering the easy ones through out life. Never really looking at the hardest one, "Love". I am broken because I never really chased love. I never really wanted or cared for it. I never cared if I existed. I realized I was broken thinking of the many reasons why I don't like anyone saying they miss me or that they love me. It feels weird when my daughter tells me. Listen I never wanted my daughter to be as messed up as me so I always reciprocated by saying it back but I can't recall a time when I just said it to her first. When I think back I can't recall ever really saying it just from saying it. When I was in relationships I would always plan to say the word at a certain time on a certain day.
I believe I'm broken because I hate my father and really have no reason to or don't remember why I hate him. I know I'm broken because I hate church going Christians who judges people and I don't even know why. I don't even know why I hate people period. This is how I know I'm broken.
I'm broken because I hate relationship struggle. I hate hurting people feelings and at the same hate that they feelings are so easy to hurt. I don't even really understand the need to have everything go my way when in reality nothing ever goes my way and yet life, in all intents and purposes, has been a great life full of amazing experiences.
I don't know if I can ever be fixed but I do know I can be more honest with myself. So I am broken and I do have a difficult time relating to people. People see an outgoing person who gets along with everyone but I don't see that at all. The way I perceive feelings is so different than anyone else. I haven't been able to relate with anyone, women or men. Nor God or Demons. Leaves me to believe I'm one of kind here on earth. Though this is another topic all together, so I'll wrap this one up with this statement. I realized today that I am broken and I don't believe that I can be fixed.
I'm not sure how long I've been on this journey but what I can tell you is that it feels like I just woke up on this journey and I'm not sure how I really arrived at this point. What I do know is that this journey that I'm currently on has a lot of trouble on it. It also has some beautiful scenery. What I'm deciding to do on this particular journey is not travel the same way I traveled in my past getting here.
I have a few obstacles that I need to navigate through carefully and make sure I do it the correct way. I have a child support case to extend child support for my 18 year old daughter to dispute. I have a business to try and keep it a float and get it off the ground. I know mistakes are a part of life but I gotta make sure I don't make the idiotic mistakes.
I feel like I'm more than one because I'm traveling on this journey however it feels like I'm definitely traveling several roads at the same time. I have my business, my finances, and my love life. There are probably journeys that I don't even realize I'm on. The one thing I can say for sure is that this journey has shown me that there really is a God or some supreme being living in my head. It's highly possible I've come to some divine understanding of all the moves that were made to perfect the being but that will just make me wonder where did it come from and why did it come. So, to protect my sanity I will just give the credit to God.
On this journey, what I want to do differently is to not let fear or failure dictate my next moves. Or any moves for that matter. I also don't want some emotional configuration to deter me from enjoying the moments of this journey and witnessing the success along the way. On this journey I want to be the best version of my current self and remember to appreciate the people who choose to be in my life knowing that I am difficult, stubborn, and an ignorant ass hole. Those people are the real MVP's in my life.
Sometimes you'll get a glimpse of your future. Sometimes you'll get a glimpse of the things you want. Sometimes you'll get a glimpse of the person you would like to be. If only that glimpse can be forever engraved in your memory to remind you of what you should be striving for. I guess that's why we sing songs, create music, and write journals. We do this to remind us of who we are and what we want to be. Through these things we are afforded a brief glimpse of our future, of the things we want, and of who we would like to be.
These brief moments of insight can be daunting or even a little hard for you to believe that something like this would ever happen to you. I like to believe that these brief visions are a gift to us. Something that helps continue to move forward with projects, relationships, or anything else we've been afforded to see.
It could be the hope in me or I can possibly be optimistic but I do hope these brief glimpse of my future and the person I would turn out to be, come to pass. The way my life is, it really needs to get better and preferably the way I envision it and the little glimpse I get every now and then.
I should preface this with saying that I am not sure if I believe or disbelieve that we have free will. I do believe in free will in the non traditional sense. However just pure free will, I do not believe we have that.
Why free will isn't exactly free will you ask. Well one we are programmed creatures. Our DNA determines our choices. Every single choice we make has already been predetermined by what is turn on, what lies dormant, and what is turned off. Every single cell in our body carries out duties that moves us through life. Some humans have conflicting information in their system that causes indecision. This causes erratic choices through out their life. All in all though, our DNA carries a lot of information. However, DNA isn't the only thing in our system that help shape us and what moves us to certain decisions in life.
Our brain carry a lot of function to. The information our brain carry mixed with our DNA greatly determines the route we will take in life. This writing for an example, I'm pretty sure this was by choice but I pretty much was programmed to do this. This is why, on the surface, free will is not exactly free will.
Artificial Intelligence have the same free will we have. The only difference is their choices are limited to the things that we programmed them for. These A.I. take the information in and choose based off what they were programmed to do. I see humans the same way. I include myself in this as well. When we are younger we are being programmed by our environment and the millions of information that has been gathered throughout the centuries and placed into our DNA.
We as adults can begin to reprogram our actions and what makes us us. In essence we can become different people and make so called conscious choices. Learn to analyze the data and then make the choice based off of everything we learned about ourselves and this world. And this is how we can really achieve free will.
This is actually a perfect time to write this piece. I'm currently sitting upset because I spilled water on myself. I'm angry and ready to destroy the world. And this type of mood I will probably sit in for the whole day just because I spilled water on myself.
My life's Philosophy though calls for the enjoyment of life. enjoy every minute no matter what happens. It's not so easy to follow but just because you have this philosophy doesn't mean you will follow to the tee. However, following this philosophy will make life a little easier to deal with.
One of the things that I do is to not worry about what others do. I only worry about what I do. I also don't worry what people might do to me and I don't care who stays or leaves my life. So anything that I do for people I do because I want to. I do believe in helping people but I help when I can, not when someone else wants me to.
The other thing that I do is I love people without needing or expecting love in return. I believe by doing this, people get it twisted and think I'm something that I'm not. There was a saying that I heard from Tupac and it goes like this - "Real niggas do what they want to do and bitch niggas do what they can do." I live by this, faithfully.
The last thing that I do is not let anything on this earth rule me. I do this perfectly. I give no one power. You can't use a God Damn thing against me. Fuck money, fuck sex, fuck fear, fuck death, fuck life, fuck whatever it is that you think you can use against me. I'll never sell myself out for anything on this damn earth. People get this shit twisted too.
They might say this philosophy doesn't allow you to appreciate things but I beg to differ. I live by this and I appreciate everything that comes my way. You have to enjoy and appreciate the moment for this philosophy to work.
My mom wrote a letter in 2011 which I will display below this paragraph. However, I just want to take a quick look back at 2011. 2011 was a year that began extremely well. It was a year that I was on top of the world and quite frankly, feeling myself. 2011 was the ending of an interesting life. Christmas of 2011 saw me get served with child support papers while I had my daughter. On that same note I was having a tumultuous relationship with a female who probably was too young for me. So for me 2011 was the last year that I was extremely happy. The last all good things happened to me.
Allow yourself to receive help from someone today, whether it is allowing someone to open a door for you or accepting someone's offer to assist you with an overwhelming task. Then ask God to present you with someone you can help. You will be blessed on both counts. Friends, family it is that time of year again, a note from Elsie. I so look forward to contact with each of you, and hearing about your year.
Here is a note that I stole from a card, it says what I wanted to say so I paraphrase some of it. Every name's a touchstone that leads to a place and time where God has used another's heart to reach out and touch mine. It may have happened years ago or even yesterday, but every person on my list has changed my life some way. Through simple conversation a warm hug or a shared meal. Every person on my list has helped me grow, heal, laugh, love, learn, and smile..... The blessings never end. As God allow our path to cross as family and friends, please know that this greeting is more than a Christmas wish. It's a "thank you" card to God for putting you on my list. Each of every one whose name I've come to hold so dear... those who have shown me Christmas Joy each and every year.
This year, 2011, has been beautiful, no death, no gross illness, family have their trials, but is keeping it together. I had a beautiful vacation this year, went to Austria, Germany, and Switzerland, absolutely beautiful oh what a trip! Vienna, has always been on my bucket list and I can truly say it has lived up to what I envision and much more. Germany has always been a pleasure, and no complaints can be said about any place in Switzerland. Work, on the home front, has been good, and as my time draw nearer to hanging up my ID, I am all smiles. May 24, 2012, on or prior to 5:30pm EST is my estimation, still hoping for donations to make this a smooth transition, smile. Alas I have given up on my dream to attend the 2012 Olympics in London, but hope catching it on a big screen TV. My plans are for cruising on the OASIS, Royal Caribbean and Hawaii in August. I will be celebrating all year long, my birthday, 62, and retirement. Please send and tell me about your year, may God continue to bless each and every one of you, with health and wealth. You may not think you are wealthy, but I know how blessed you are. PS call, e-mail or write me, no texting please.
Love Elsie.
Okay, so many of you probably don't know but I work in a call center. I received inspiration in the unlikeliest place. A phone call from a member who just had a simple search where there was connection or vibing. At least not in the beginning. And it wasn't the usual kind of vibing when it was or we was vibing. It was more like, I understood what she needed and not what many of you might be thinking. It was just a simple, I understood what was going and I was able to assist. At least the best way that I could.
Now I know you're wondering how this call or how she was inspiration. The cynics will definitely be out as well but sometimes we miss the big picture when we try to figure out what it is a person is trying to do instead of what it is that they are doing. Well during that call she was very flirtatious and it isn't the flirting that gave me inspiration. It was the aggressiveness at which she did it. Mind you, she was a frustrated caller in the beginning cause she already spoke to a rep and the information she got didn't yield any results. Then she gets to me. All I wanted to do is get a list of providers she wanted and hope that it yielded results.
I think my voice is what got her attention, it usually does. Once she found out that we were in Tampa together that's when the flirting took place. Now I don't know if she was for real but I do know that it was more aggressive than what other women usually do. This caught my attention. The calls are recorded though, so I didn't want to play along and have this call pulled and be in the office having them teach me about ethics and anything else they would feel the need to teach me. So I just listened and smiled and let her do her thing.
I did grab her email though. Knowing that I will figure a way to use it without getting myself into to much trouble. However at this point I don't see a way of doing so. Maybe one day chance will have us meet. But for now I will close this chapter on an interesting phone call and write several different pieces because of it.
